Who is number two?
..and who does he work for?

Friday, October 29, 2010

Magical Properties Tour

While in Calgary last weekend for the Magical Properties Tour (the Gaslamp Killer, Daedelus, 12th Planet, Teebs) I was able to have a quick chat with Teebs after his set. He played an hours worth of downtempo and dreamy beats ranging from his own original tracks, to Knxwledge, Kona Triangle, and a particularly excellent remix of a Boards of Canada tune I can't name at this time. Anyways, I bought his new LP called "Ardour" and he decided to give me a copy of Ardour B-Sides on cd. Thank You Teebs! I highly recommend checking out his new LP but in the meantime take a listen to the 6 B-Sides as they are here in WAV audio and are an extremely rewarding listen if you like instrumental hip hop. Everything from harps, chimes, tribal percussion, the most watery sounding guitar riffs (check track 5/6 for this), and detuned synths. Enjoy!
alternate link: ardour b-sides

Action News Team's First Ep

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

And Pop! goes the Weezel.....

drrty POP! (kids. If you ever needed a reason not to do drugs...)

(turns around in chair, notices the screen world, takes foot out of mouth...)

O, Hello there and Welcome to Today's Edition of OK Spuddroker's MAGIK! Series.
Every few days or so for the next little while Herr Spuddroker will be posting a variety of Introductory Works, Theoretical Texts, Profane Grimoires and Practice Books to help one better comprehend the wonderful super duper uber welt o' MAGIK*

Split the Peach
the Seed!

 *(side note: The spelling with a K was chosen by one Uncle AL to differentiate his concept of the psycho-spiritual art und "science" from other practices, such as stage magic. The word  Magic has been used by countless magicians before and after without the K. Mr. Israel Regardie and other Magicians see no reason to surrender the word to the arena of stage magicians. Aesthetically I prefer just the K so meh just a moot point that needed to be made.)

In our grubby little hands (or on our Computers if you followed the golly gosh darn link) is POP MAGIC! by Grant Morrison. A lovable Scot who is renowned for being a Comic Book Writer of seemingly endless invention and imagination. He's done so many freakin things it's impossible to even conceive of a decent list without doing such an injustice to this spectacular human being. Personally, my favourite bit has been The Invisibles (which I think everyone should pick up, specially if you want to look deeper into the ol' Occult), but check it all out, tis quite good. HONEST ENGINE!

Any howdy who, he's put together a short wonderful little article that should get anyone in the mood for a little of the Magish. Straight forward, no b-s, and right to the point. A couple of practices, a deeper look into invocation and evocation that isn't tainted with a bunch of hub bub or fiddle faddle foo. Plus, while barely scraping the surface he makes some far reaching points on heavier issues that tend to come up (specially if yer in way o'er yer head).

One quote (which is actually a quote of Uncle AL's) that will considerably unhinge those doors of the labrynth we call the mind without completely blowing them off, I think is worthy of mention on these pages for a little clarification of many of the things said and are goin to be said:

"In this book it is spoken of the sephiroth and the paths, of spirits and conjurations, of gods, spheres, and planes and many other things which may or may not exist.  It is immaterial whether they exist or not.  By doing certain things, certain results follow; students are most earnestly warned against attributing objective reality or philosophical validity to any of them."

Trust me, without this healthy little reminder, you can get a little lost in the deep dark woods/wonderous endless bliss of yers or someone else concoction or worse: become overtly und obssesively paranoid/full of yerself. Smell the roses and enjoy but know when it's about time to force that butt off its rump and head back into the fray. Check yerself, before ye wreck yerself. One cannot help to mention the Myth of Icarus at this junction as well. But that's for another time (or figure it out yerself. cough)

Still not much better has been written for the modern mind set in recent years (everyone worthy of mentioning (lot o' nuts in this fruit bowl) has seemed moved onto bizarre outskirt sciences which are increasingly with due pace beginnning to blur the lines between the two concepts/fields more and more. AND FER VERY GOOD REASON! again look into it. i can only touch base so much before it gets chaffed). Apparently G-Mo is supposed to be expanding the POP! for a single stand alone edition (god forbid) but in the mean time, Chew (slowly. don't wanna choke now...) on THIS!

(there is supposed to be an episode of I AM WEASEL named "I AM DEITY" here but i found it way too much of a hassle to upload. If you get a chance, watch it. It will help clarify certain ideas spread out on this page like a tasty piece of toast. Or it will either confuse you so much that it may give you Brain Cancer. Either way, do yerself a favour and check'er out.)

TU TU tin
'til we meet again

OKiss my S

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Visa's for Touring the States

Okay, so my band is planning a North American tour. I have heard many ways in which you can accomplish getting across the border, most ways unfortunately are illegal. Some bands end up not making it, completely screwing themselves over by getting caught and being banned from the states for five years. Im guessing that after that five year period is up, getting into the states will never truely be easy for them again.

Just with my personality type, I know, that if we were to put together some crazy scam to get across the states, I would probably go crazy right up until we made it through. I couldn't handle it. No way. There's no way I could rely on chance, and five people getting the same story straight. Especially for an extensive tour in the states that would need major planning, not to mention quitting our jobs, buying a van, also trying to get merch across etc.

I have heard many ways of doing it illegally, but as a band, we have decided to go about it legally. Which if we can acquire working Visas, will allow us everything we need to get into the states, tour, bring our merch and come home no problemo. I have also heard that even with a Visa they can still deny your entry, but the chance is way smaller.

Upon initially asking around for advice and information, I found that there wasn't very much available to someone who really has no idea what they are doing. I didn't even know where to start. I turned to my friends in a band currently touring the states and was given the name of an organization that could help and affordably.

At this point I realized, I should track my progress, keep people updated with mistakes or important things you need beforehand if you are also planning on obtaining a Visa for touring the states. So this is my gift to anyone attempting to do the same thing: my experience doing so, updated as we complete the steps in the process. I know I would have appreciated something like this, so I hope you do!

Up until this point I heard that Visas were ridiculously expensive to get, up to $1000 or more per member. Which does sound ridiculous and in most cases probably annihilated any hope a band had of touring the states. This is not true! The organization I was referred to is called Tamizdat. Visa's for your entire band (no matter how many members) is $1200. Which if you have a 5 person band, $240 each, sounds reasonable right? Right. Some companies like Globalaxs can charge an upwards of $2090, and that's for a four person band. Apparently Tamizdat helps get the $1000 "processing fee" waived.

So once deciding that we were going with Tamizdat, we emailed them letting them know that we wanted to use their organization for Visa services, they set us up a band code and away we go.

First thing you may want to look at is a list of things you'll need for the application process.


First things first, you need a TON of press, like lots, as much as you can get! And press from outside of Canada too, the more the better. Big name blogs, music reviews, magazines, whatever, you need it.

So this is our first struggle, my band does not have a lot of press. A couple mentions here and there but no reviews, nothing really. Once I found out about this, I realized that our initial timeline just got fucked. We are leaving for tour in may, 199 days from now. We need to have everything in and processed by Tamizadat by an absolute minimum 100 days before we leave for tour.

That leaves me with 99 days to figure this shit out, book the tour, record and have demos available and sent for our application. Not to mention, a ton of press I have to magically try and get. So that is where we are currently sitting.

Vanessa Fever

Sunday, October 24, 2010

O,That Voodoo that You Do-Do- Approaching The Infinite - Baby's First Grimoire

WARNING: This "Piece" is Subject tor redundant Revisions, EXTREME Editing and Massive Overhaul. This is due to the lack of planning and the sheer impulsive hurried nature of this text + the unbareable fatherfuckin' nitpicking of the author

Good Day and a Deep Throat to One and Y'all.(long story)

Here's some Food for thought=
Are you tired of feeling like a Number?
Small, Insignificant and almost pointless?
A cog in the woodworks making a "living"?
Welliky WellkiLy Wellkiky

Now (all of a sudden) The Number Two invites you to quiz this deliciously corrupt and bleak (not to mention) heartless world endlessly and force you to give it some answers (or else....c'mon.....shake harder boy....)
How would you go about doing this seemingly impossible and perhaps dangerous, tiring & perplexing task?
No Problemo
Its As Free und Easy As
1 2 3......................(bore)
So get yer finger out of yer ass with the extra-ordinary, well beyond spacetime-proven fine Art und(t) delicate Psy Phi "Science" and Cantankerous Chaotic Counter Culture of T.R.U.T.H. known as


Now what is MAGIK? Surely most children (or innocents) can give an answer to this easily, while most "Adults" will give you blank stares and try to force you into their blanck holes of boring restictive mediocrity they (mis)label "The Real World". yawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwn ahem,,,

Simply put MAGIK (tm) is everything and can be found everywhere since it pierces anything (bein' everything), connecting the whole bleedin' entirety (since it happens to be everything) and pretty much maintains the whole bloody chaosmos in one nicely endlessly shifting forming/unforming entropic/syntropic eternally full void of incredible mass & energy across existence, "things" and well......change foreverever.(foreverever?)

 Alrightang, well you might be all supersayan that's all fine and dandy sugar candy with cream on top but all you are doing seemingly be putting more gunk and spam on the ol viewing holes that seem to keep getting dimmer every goddess darn day. WHATS YER FUCKIN GAWD DAMN POINT?!??!?!

My objective here would be to take those old peepers and give youse some new fresh and more infotainin' ones. The quickest definition I can give is that MAGIK = Communication. Period. Still that will leave many people with more questions than Answers.  For further elaboration I'll bring up one Mr. Robert Anton Wilson's thoughts on the (anti)matter at hand from his lovely book THE ILLUMINATUS TRILOGY:

"..There is no essential difference between MAGIK, Behavior Therapy, Advertising and Christian Science." (I'd throw hynotism, debate,"non fictional" literature and many a game people play in there for good measure)

"All this, of course, is programming your own trip by manipulating appropriate clusters of word, sound, image, and emotional energy."

So there we have a bit of an idea of what we are talking about even if its still a little off and, let's face it, pretty out there. A popular working definition for MAGIK is an intentional act/deed done to cause a change/s to occur in conformity with one's will. Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy. So easy that anyone can do it. EVEN YOU! (ya big dummy!)

Hell with a definition like that most people are doing MAGIK all the freakin' time.

(But as we'll come to learn we are affected by other people's mojo more than we can ever realize and that much we want to change is caused by acts we are unaware of our involvement in! But isn't that just half o' the fun?) 

Of course one may ask where is all the smoke and mirrors? Where's all the robes, fancy big words and goat's blood? NO MORE! NOW! with OK Spuddroker's time proven method, we get rid of all that jazz and leave you with nothing but the solid hard Rock to secure yer thoughts and roll on out(look ma! no mo blues!).
All you need now = yer Imagination, a bit of focus/ability to criticize/introspect/meditate, a sense of humour and yer set fo life. (no more wasted moneys at the Sev ever agin!)

Still not satisfied? ARGHHHHHH AW WELL FINE.(d) BE THAT WAY! I'll even provide an EXAMPLE just to show you old whippersnappers how we roll here in the Recently Ancient and Profondly Unrepositionalphanumeric(ubergross)-aightened Collective of the Almighty Glyphil of TWO!

from the late great Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford=

"For Example, I am standing here at the podium at the head of the classroom. I am thirsty and would like a drink of water. I ask a student if he would be kind enough to bring me a glass of water. The kindly student gets up, goes to the water cooler at the back of the classroom, draws me a glass of water and delivers it to me.

This simple scenario doesn't seem very magical does it? However, from my point of view it was a miraculously successful conjuration. By strength of my will (and with only a few well-chosen magical
words of enchantment) I set into obedient motion an entire hierarchy of spiritual beings;

• I, Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford (the Deity),

• had a need which I defined and named as "thirst"
 (Divine Name of a desire formulated by the Deity).
• Activating my unambiguous spiritual authority as your teacher, I declare the Divine Name (vibrations of
sound declaring my thirst) and inspire an archangel (student) to fulfill my desire
• The archangel then activates an army of angels within himself; angels of the eye to seek out and locate the water cooler, angels of nerves and muscles and equilibrium to propel him through space and around obstacles until he reaches his goal.
• At the water cooler, the angel then employs the Intelligences and Spirits of gravity and hydrodynamics to fill the glass with water.
• The process is then reversed until the archangel delivers the water to me thereby fulfilling the will of the Deity.

TA DA! IMPRESTOMUNDO! YADDA DADA DOO! ABRACADABRA!POOF! (added for dramatic effect...please hold for applause...)

This may not be what you think of when you think of MAGIK, but I assure you it is MAGIK In fact, most of the spiritual activity that took place in the above scenario actually occurred on the invisible plane. No one could see my words of enchantment. No one could see the internal processes that inspired and propelled the student to the water cooler, or the invisible force of gravity. For all intents and purposes, I wanted a drink of water and only seconds after focusing my will upon that desire, a glass of water traveled through space and appeared in my hands."

There you have it. Pure down to earth homemade like great grandandroygny-cra MAGIK. In the following weeks I will be exploring this topic more.........profoundly N in deeper depths than eva b4. fo realz. No givesies Backsies. eva eva.

Now i leave you with the wisdom of one Dr. Leary:
"Revolution without revelation is tyranny;
Revelation without revolution is slavery."

Well now if that ain't a powder keg I don't wanna know what is......(except.....you know....nothing is)

I hope this has been enlightening for you.

OK NO-KEY Spuddsssrokerrr


If yer still not convinced or want a second opinion
Check this:


 A bit of Author/Magician/All around rad cat Monsieur Alan Moore's much more elaborate and ornate Words on the subject that melts in yr mind, not in yr pants.

Friday, October 22, 2010

kids with guns

this shit wakes me up in the middle of the night
and i don't mean the lizards

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Food for Thought

we are going to tear this planet apart
by the seams of it's rivers
and every forgotton stream
have you heard what happens to a fish out of water?
why does a fish out of water dance?
because he thinks it's his last chance

we will burn down evil with the light
feed them to our devilish children
we will grow a brand new strain
for the demons begone
you have no place here
we exterminate, what we hate

and if you think you can withstand
our subsonic tidal wave
pressurized crystalline matter
drove straight into your valves
shut tight the doors that hold your secrets
we are the key to your memories
you will remember who you are
and what you were meant to do
you will live a life in the flesh
....you live a life better than the rest

squealing chasms
of fortuned creatures
squiggles of vapor
seaweed catacombs
a choice of words
along with the birds
we sign a new anthem

we will never see your filthy smile
if we live in a world made worthwhile
i can't pretend i am the chosen child
but we can speak on his part
and as we will say the wonderful things
that begin with me, and end with you
cant you see... it's an eternity?
it's a simple thing, really!
like a patron in a shopping mall
with all the things you need to buy
with soo many wants you'll still cry...for more 

again a change of pace
now that i have you in the place
where i can speak my mind
and connect through yours
listening and reading is connection through subjection
to what i really meant, and how it relates to you

your a beautiful snowflake
flying through the winter sky
as the cold breeze chills your spine
you'll finally realize that you are divine
so if we are made of light and shiny things,
why must we clip our wings? 
before we even had the chance to fly?

if we were meant to burn,
in a hopeless garbage dumpster
like a homeless bottle jumper
  we would be as dead as this language
and you'll never know what it says:

wakka drog kolliok tai khent
eertkah khiamo khaidom
dioloko jioux ca vest ik khamen
if jeux khan doest jai obest
aparella con daeomest
die kaedohm saround eid mhodeak!

Bands in Calgary you probably haven't heard of that are awesome!

Hello! I'm Vanessa, and ill be posting a little series called "Bands in Calgary you probably haven't heard of that are awesome!" In this edition ill be outlining a band that used to live in the house next to mine. Well two members did anyways.  Kaspar Hauser is a three piece band with evident influence raining from post rock to emotive hardcore. Zack Choy, Alex Fischer and although he wasn't a neighbor, he is a good friend and bassist for Fox Opera, Keith Rodger.
The recording quality itself I don't enjoy so much, definitely a must see live sort of band. But the music is amazing, addictive, and fierce. If you want to feel the full effect of this band, sit alone with the lights off or with soft lighting, hit play, and enjoy, unless of course you have shitty internet, you may need to let each song load first.
Unfortunately I don't have permission to give out a download link for the demo, and I know myspace is a piece of shit, but, in my humble opinion they are still worth the crappy sound quality for  a listen. And who knows, maybe when they actually release the demo, you'll pick one up?
Anyways I have a kitten play date so good evening all number 2 collectivians.

Vanessa Fever


Sunday, October 17, 2010

"that's the way it is: beautiful"


la la
De da.
ho hum...
well that's no fun.

(synapse simplicity for felicity)
Humid Heffer can't climb his tramp to safety.
What's the matter?
Can't you place blame?
No matter
Just embrace for impact
and proceed to deface pleas.....

"You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends. But you can't pick your friend's nose."

says who?

Oh She Been

She been a while since i've posted. In fact, so long that i needed to call up the trusty Master for the password because i had forgotten it! Anyhow, here are a couple new tracks folks. The first one is a track made at 98 bpm, so it's a great track for casual head nodding. The second is a collaboration between myself and Clayton Delaney, otherwise known as Nightkruw. This is our first project together and is somewhat of a dubstep prototype. Enjoy!

Astral Emissions by Cpt.K

Hodge 301 feat Nightkruw by Cpt.K

Friday, October 15, 2010

please sir, where's the withered hand?

coughing in the rafters, 
like a barn owl

teeth in a jar / 
wasp in a jar / 
oil in a jar /
a hummingbird tied 

to a tin can

sink-in / deerskin

g *
& i

metal man?
photocopy your cat?
max ernst

- Ed

Thursday, October 14, 2010


i've been polishing, abiding my time
and i don't know if i'll be back for awhile, cuz
it's been a long time, and it'll be a long time
i've got riches in other places
home is where your head is

fuck me up, kick in my teeth
lay waste in this town
and all the people in it
you'll come down
just give it a minute or two
it's good for what ails you
it's good for what ails you

fuck me up, pour me some tea
lay waist to me
cuz in this town
you find modern man
and he lives fast
so awkwardly cast
by past process passed
but give it a minute or two

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Tube Fruit, All Smiles and Chocolate


i's been prospectin around the internet, and boy, i found some gold! completely unbeknown to me, and any of my peers as far as i know, until now, Isaac Brock of Modest Mouse released a tape only demo in 1993 called "Tube Fruit, All Smiles and Chocolate" with only 100 produced copies. this 25 song beast is extremely reminiscent of the last 7 or 8 songs off of Sad Sappy Sucker - horrible quality, freshly pubescent Isaac Brock, sloppy tempo, out of tune, technically flawed, it's undoubtedly the birthing of Modest Mouse, which is a beautiful thing.



prospector brown

(if the above link stops working, let me know and i will remedy the situation)

Who Does Number 2 Work For???!!!!

1. Eee-Kom Goh-Ahn
2. The Shwaccident
3. Incoming Transmission
4. The K-Tasrophy ( feat. Righteous Brothers )
5. Biotechnique ( feat. Randen )
6. Cyberpunk Aesthetics
7. The Past Kinda Panda ( feat. Ramses )
8. Infernal Contraption

This is my new EP called "Cyberpunk Aesthetics"
Listen to the entire album on Soundcloud or Grab an official:

320kbps MP3 Download from Mediafire

I also have another special treat for you folks!
here is a preview of Two brand New Tracks!!

The Chimes of Doom ( Unreleased Single )
The Chimes of Doom by The Master of Pants ( WIP - Unreleased Single ) by masterofpants

Language Barrier ( Upcoming album Preview )
Language Barrier by masterofpants

please stay tuned... 
this episode was brought to you by:
The # 2


.....I don't know what to say either.



When all else fails, have a basement show

The Number Two Collective Presents The Tour Cancellation Civil War Re-Enactment Party!

October 22nd 2010


Fresh off their cancelled tour, they will be making up for it with a re-enactment of the American Civil War. This time, they will have EP's. For a free download of their new EP ''Glemno Essi'' click here: 

The Bird Sang Song
They will be providing the charm for the evening. Handsome-core. Make sure to pick up their full length ''Give This To My Children'' .

If Bob Dylan and Daniel Johnston adopted a son, he would probably listen to music like this. DoT will be releasing an EP on The Number Two.

Jupiter Wells
Mysterious. Yes very mysterious indeed.....

Cat Piss House (please message one of the bands for the address)
Music starts at 9pm. Costumes are strongly encouraged.

This is a basement show, at someone's home. Please respect the home so we can all have a good time. Please don't punch holes in the ceiling like that last guy....


Grandpa Buckwheat

Flint - Glemno Essi FREE DOWNLOAD


As an apology for not having the EP ready, for a limited time only, FREE EP DOWNLOAD FOR EVERYONE! Includes Artwork. For those who came to the release show and wanted a CD, please message us and you will be sent a free copy when they are done. They will be available online and at shows as soon as possible. Unfortunately, our tour has been cancelled too.So, for the lack of CD's and touring, there will be a make-up show in Edmonton! News on that soon.


Thank you to those who came to the ''release show'' last night, we really didn't expect such a great turnout for a Tuesday night. Huge thanks to Whiskeyface, Jom Comyn, and the National Security Council for playing with us. Their sets were amazing and we will definitely be playing with you guys again.


Grandpa Buckwheat

Monday, October 11, 2010

"Life isn't in having the luck of the cards, but in playing a poor hand well."


Brothers and Sisters (and Any other Creed/Animal/Sex i have neglected to awknowledge!)
After we've had our fill of sacrificial bird and jack o lattern paste with our loving families........





















IS IT ABOUT TIME FOR YOU TAKE A STAB err... .STAND!!!!!>!!>!>!>>!>!!?!!!??!!?#?!#?!?!?!?
THE ONLY TIME IS NOW! NOW! NOW! no not quite yet but NOW!!!!!!!

well after stirring the pot a tad I'd like to end with some immortal words that ring truer everyday:

"Fuck the War.
We're in Love."



Just so I don't paint a one sided picture
Here's some lighter food for thought:





Saturday, October 2, 2010

"The question is not whether it's a joke. The question is how many people it will fuck."

‏בְּרֵאשִׁ֖ית בָּרָ֣א אֱלֹהִ֑ים אֵ֥ת הַשָּׁמַ֖יִם וְאֵ֥ת הָאָֽרֶץ׃

Lucifer before the Lord, by Mihály Zichy (ca. 1887).